again, something i typed out late night, half asleep, half assed. this is just something that i was inspired to suddenly write. i dont know why- its late and everyone is asleep and here i am, "i should write another one shot" all i ever write are one shots.
It was such a somber thing. The tension in the air could've snapped like a twig if the slightest of untreaded grounds were pursued. We knew things were different. But that didn't mean we were entirely too accepting of the fact that, we no longer knew who the other was anymore. The only thing I knew was his name and our memories. It was the same for him.
"Hey..Nezumi?"
I turned my view from the rain outside to Shion. The power was out, and I could only see his face through the occasional flashes of lightning outside of his window. What I managed to see, though, was a face whose expressions I no longer knew like the back of my hand.
"Yea?""What've you been up to these-"
I cut him off with a click of my tongue. There was no need to discuss things that didn't matter.
"Shion. Do you actually care what I've occupied myself with for six years? I don't have all night, and I promise you. It'd take all night."
He simply replied with an "Oh."
We had been standing in his bedroom for over an hour. He was on the side of the room opposite to where I was. It was almost obvious that he didn't want me there, seeing as he put so much space in between us, as if I was carrying some contagious disease. But, on the slight chance that I just didn't know him well enough anymore, and I was misjudging his actions, I insisted on staying. The only reason I was there in the first place, was because I had run out of options. I had nowhere to go, and the one time i had nowhere to turn to, it started raining really fucking hard outside. But, once I got settled in, I found myself not wanting to leave.
Karan had passed on, apparently, and Shion still resided in the bakery in Lost Town. It was something that felt like a home to me, a long time ago.
"Nezumi, you shouldn't stand near the window during a storm. The glass could shatter. Well, there's a very slim chance of it doing so, I mean, the weather isn't even very bad tonight. But.. but still..it's not an abnormal thing to take precations, right? I really wouldn't want you to get hurt in my own bedroom. That'd weigh down on my conscious. I'd probably feel pretty bad and as of now I don't feel very good. So, that'd just add onto how I'm feeling right now. Nezumi, why did you come back, now of all times?"
I didn't expect him to say so much at once. He had the worst habit of rambling on when we were both kids, it was something that he should've grown out of by now. But I couldn't bring myself to act annoyed, it was so familiar. I felt as if maybe, Shion was still Shion in certain aspects. His voice hadn't changed at all, either, and I hadn't really noticed until then. He had barely said a word all night.
"You still sound like some prepubescent brat."
The words escaped my mouth without hesitation. It took me a few seconds to realize what I had said, and I immediately regretted it. It just felt so natural. It felt like six years ago.
"Shion, I'm sorry."
There was no noise. Nothing. I couldn't hear even the slightest breath.. mainly because of the pouring rain hitting against the window. It was still dark. I began to reach out for Shion, hoping that I hadn't just said something too terribly wrong.
I took one step and ended up bumping into him and falling flat on my ass.
"Dammit, what were you trying to do?" I felt my cheeks getting hot. Being near him was too awkward, and this didn't help.
"I wanted to be closer to you."
Shion helped me up, and it was quiet again. We stood there in the dark, like two dumbfounded kids, clueless as to what to say or do. The distance between us was dangerous. We shouldn't have been so close.
I began to feel the urge to lean in and taste his lips.. allow his to tongue make itself familiar with mine once more. I wanted to relive the intimacy we shared when we were sixteen, all in this one night. I wanted to remember the smell of Shion. I wanted to remember how Shion tasted. I wanted to remember the sounds he'd make. I just wanted to remember Shion.
Our lips met.
So many things about Shion were different, but his lips, the ones I previously dominated so many times, provided me with such a satisfying familiarity that I had been longing for. I was unsure of whether or not to deepen the kiss, until Shion did so for me. I parted my lips and his tongue tasted of salt and Shion. It was so sloppy and off and wrong but it was just like it was back then. I held onto Shion as if I were drowning. I never wanted to let go again, I never wanted to feel like a stranger with the man I still loved so much. I clutched onto him relentlessly. I kept pulling him towards me, as if I could make us become one if we had gotten close enough.
I held his hands. His beautiful, soft hands. They had gotten bigger. I traced patterns on his back, and kissed the scar on his face. I ran my digits through his messy hair. It felt the same as it did. I kissed his tears away. They also tasted like salt and Shion. Shion. I was so terribly enveloped in everything Shion that I couldn't help but to also shed a few tears.
Shion was the one to eventually break it off.
"Nezumi." He smiled, and it was Shion's smile. That never changed.
I sank down to the floor, pulling him down with me. He positioned himself next to me, draping his legs over my outstretched ones. We sat next to the window in silence; there was nothing to be said. We both realized that we were still the kids we were. We both realized we were still in love, and that was all we needed. That was all we wanted.
↧